Brown As Fuck

Posted on: Tuesday, January 30th, 2018

Is it weird how every color
Bounces off your face
And it’s perfect

Are we not yet tired of campaigns campaigning, telling
Beauty equals lighter
Skin

Fuck them
They have no
Soul to burn

I will not let
The body inherited become
The statement and mockery of another

It is as mine as yours is yours
It is for me to love as much as you love yours
It is with passion and pride I carry it as passionate and as pround as you catwalk with yours

Brown is the skin of my mother
Brown is the skin of my father
Brown is the skin of their home town
They are quite proud of that

Brown is the skin of the earth
I hope the ravines will climb down to me, some times
As brown is the skin of me
And I would grow my gardens electric

As a child, I watched the TV and read
The cheap tabloits that screech
“Skin bleach!”
Nothing but “Skin bleach!”

So as a child, I thought maybe I should
Pour acid onto me
So I could
Fit
I could be
Mold into

In elementary school, in our Catholic
Upbringing
I remember like it was yesterday
Was this kid, bless him
Made fun of me at the
Computer room

(I am so good at computer
Always was
I felt I was at home there)
But because I was brown, he
Bullied me

He said something along the lines
Of how my dark fat lips were a
Travesty

And I remember faintly
Of hating every
Ancestor

I speak Cebuano, too
But I’ve never been to
Cebu
Not one day prior to this
Brown ode

And how I hated myself for no reason
But having been born
Lush

O’– the Almighty lottery of birth
Did I
Just lose?

No.

I open
Facebook pages
Of such beautifully
Built
Men

They’re selling
Glutathione
Some injectible or some
Shit, or some
Pill

“For a better you”

Ha!

A lighter skin wouldn’t make my
Soul
Better

I wish it were that easy
To make my
Soul
Better

Come kneel, come pray
Come semi-hate where you’re
Supposed to be from

But they don’t know where I come from

My father, he
Used to draw into imagination
The carabaos and alligators and eagles and some nuno sa punso mumbo jumbo
Where he grew
The land of the brown
The land before electricity
The time of letters
The time before texts
The time where malignos
Walked the earth

Maybe they bought into the
Supermarket and the
Talipapas
Where they haunt the
Children

(Perhaps our folklore monsters
Shop exclusively online now
That’s why we no longer
See them

Ha!)

Last month, a ho
Told me ho liked my
Brown
Complexion
“The complexion of the
Poor”

Ha!

(Comments like that are why said ho was shelved from the fun
Ho wishes ho were
Rich as my soul is rich
With soul rich as my mind is rich)

Whatever
I still drove them out their room with my brown skills and my brown name while I played with their now-brown minions

Without so much as a
Brown sweat, brown effort

Chooses
Me over
Anyway
Because I have
This brown tact
This brown power
This brown sexy
This brown allure
This brown cinematic
This brown skin

That grants the image
Of me spending
Hundreds of hours
By the
Beach, the
Hammock, and the
Summer playlist, and
Cyanwave short shorts,
Drinking the goddamn rainbow

Of blue, citrus, vodka, mix, coconut, lime, something– a thing
And rust-tint
Sunglasses, and sand sprinkled on my sexy

Brown pecs and my sexy
Brown belly and my sexy
Brown biceps and my sexy
Brown smiles, brown curves

By the beach that makes me the hottest
Brown …power?
Or something

Stop fetishizing my brown skin for one second

Stop villainizing the tongues I know in passing for a minute

Stop equating my form to whatever thoughts of war or help or famine or folklore you
May have brought with you

Because I have libraries compressed in this
Head you couldn’t
Compete against

My mountainous philosophical discourse and how I’m great at them and

This brown poetry perversion
You wish you could compete against

Ha!

I cackle my brown cackle
And my brown land where I grow my brown crops and my brown stories and my brown
Humor

I wrote Life In The Infinite, for my own brown’s sake!

And my brown success
And my brown tomorrow
And my brown upset
And my brown confidence, and talents
For my brown future
And my brown friends and my brown children

 
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