Better Dressed

Better Dressed

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There's pride in sharing And then there's bowing down To lust upon Hollywoodizing mythologies my kababayan are eager to laud about It's easier to hate your own, hate your own, hate your own Because you wait for the paint to turn to white So you can appreciate them? With what? A bigger pocket? A better dress? What to you makes a better dress? One that submits to universal attention? But they weren't designed after Western values They were made for your immediates' eyes You twist your tongue to sound like you come from another village and pity those who still talk like the previou ...Read more

How Many Bottles

How Many Bottles

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Ace was keeping score His friends didn't know it, but he was keeping score He doesn't know himself, doesn't know his loved ones Doesn't get to know the world revolving around him when he's parked He's the getaway vehicle to the getaway beach Left on the street overlooking the ocean and the sun Distanced from all the joyous commotions between him and his peers, the embracing warmth of the sand As Bethany and Brent and Brenda smile and sip in margaritas He's the odd fourth wheel in a group of strong personalities Him, the quiet Him, the weakest Him, the one who makes sentimental call ...Read more

We Are The Difficult People

We Are The Difficult People

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Part I: Chaos And Religion If you had a nickel for every time you crossed the road rooting for speeding cars to hit you in the middle in the middle where you close your eyes, waiting for that glorious fin Knowing that you will not get cheered on in the afterlife and you're okay with it But in the cold in-betweens and moments of internal chaos that have you wondering should you give in to theism, humanity's greatest vanity bow down to deities, pray to non-existing endless varieties that your mother and her sisters would not shut up about that the world wouldn't stop shoving down our ...Read more

The Machine

The Machine

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Your body is a machine What does the machine yearn for? Why do the hinges, greased in oil, still fear of rust You are made of, supposed to be made of metal, your heart is pure adamantine, but your lungs are agony On one end, your creator door with all the answers, so ask away Why you are the way that you are And how your pieces hold together so effortlessly ugly You stand closer to your reflection and think about your arms and the arms of the many whom you cannot be Have you not worked hard enough to sculpt your bones, your very genes into the likes of those you consider maste ...Read more

Milk+

Milk+

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Lovely, these metaphors you sing for your sadness Like four blankets at night to keep your hypothermic heart from collapsing, contracting Just like a sitcom but never funny I see through your sunny, honey I see through your morbid Speak to me more about your profound nonsense You and your posts You and your profile pictures captioned with inspirational bullshit Fake You aren’t warm But you can try– cry as you do Throw your bullets at easy targets, now, now Those people are designed to be taken down easy Or at least, In your head, They are You do not want to go back to the p ...Read more

Disassemblia

Disassemblia

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I disassembled my body and created a confessor a parent in my head Told her things I weren't ready to share with the world yet Held her hand, She took mine as ether poured light into me She was the practice dummy I bore my soul to A subreddit dedicated to the unburrowing of my sins Her ears were always pressed to my shriveled mouth as teeth clinked to wail out despair Stood there in silence and allowed her to love me as I yearned to be loved and failed Why do you look like my mother? Why do you sound like her feel like her Resemble her in every way but tangible Why were you t ...Read more

Nectarine of the gods

Nectarine of the gods

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I am not alright with dying. I am not alright with living, either. I am stuck in the pathos in between, A purgatory of my own making. One thread, one sledgehammer of my own sins. Some times I hate everyone. Some times I hate myself. I’m sick. I’m dizzy. Growing peaches in the dark. Getting stoic, Going greedy. Nectarine before the fall, Remedric after thaw. The world rushes straight, heteronormative too much, Disputes over land, Made-up histo[r]ic value, Burying children in the sand. Surely the gods didn’t put us here to argue but, boy, do you enjoy it. Forward. Forward. ...Read more

Enough

Enough

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You do not compare to him All your work and you still do not compare to him You aren't even a pale imitation Just a passing soul that will never be good enough Tall enough Succeeding enough Resilient enough Happy enough Powerful enough enough Enough! You set his picture as your screensaver A telltale of a man you will never become That green sun pierces through your blinds Consume you with gusto like burns on your face You will never be that sight for sore eyes That calms the city and lull giants to sleep They want not your flesh and will toss you aside for fresher peach, a ...Read more

The Green Sun

The Green Sun

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Take Me Where You Lay

Take Me Where You Lay

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Buff top. Cisgender. Take me to where you lay. I would never introduce you to my sanctuarium my bed is basillica My mind registering the fake name you gave me as you pry into the movements in my eyes You'll never catch me lie I'm way too trained "You should be thankful I decided to look your way, "waste my time your way, "grateful I gave you this time of day "blah blah. I walk on water. Send me photos from your youth back when the vibrance hasn't been purged out of your skin. Yet. Let me see how you see yourself because that's how I'll peel into your skin as I frame your tight b ...Read more

I Like His Way Of Things

I Like His Way Of Things

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I like the way he breathes near my mouth and teases me with half-kisses I like the way he giggles at my unsteady and fervor I like the way our tongues wrestle with each other I like his way of things He calls me by the pet name he made up In a way, nobody ever fills my stomach with this much battalion, butterflies I find myself waiting for him where we first met first laid eyes on our future got each other's numbers, names, addresses, hearts I like the way he pulls me close when he's sleeping on my bed because goddamnit, it's the best feeling I've ever felt in my entire existe ...Read more

Holding Hands With Someone You Don't Love

Holding Hands With Someone You Don’t Love

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How could you tell me I'm beautiful and not mean it? I guess lying is easy, pretending convenient when you don't really care for its target What I want from you is something you cannot give and what you ask from me is patience which I do not have Your love, a poorly done falsetto and my heart deafened by your silence. You try to hold me as I retreat Lying beside me but my body wants you to leave I distance my back from your chest and ignore how comforting your arms are around not just my naked skin but my naked being Could you not make me the villain even when I am? Could you not ...Read more

Hello, Stranger

Hello, Stranger

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Hello, New Mark Hello, New Michael Hello, New Mitchell What's your name this time? What do you like? Where do you live? What do you think of my clothes? Of my name? Would you like me to change again? Should I be someone else? Someone more likeable? Someone more relatable? It's nice meeting you Small town, ain't? No. It is not. But I still want to paint it that way Think of it that way I feel like this is fate I hope you feel that, too I have to re-learn you The whole value of you Your quirks The things you want and those you hate Until you choose to leave I know you'd w ...Read more

Expert Cruiser

Expert Cruiser

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Tonight, I'm going to bed with someone without a face That's okay; I bet he understands why Start our game meters of a crowd in between to bed, to his Gaia drying on my pecs him licking off the pool he made from my right nipple Call each other 'baby' because we couldn't be bothered with names put my weight on his body, kiss his name, gently, messily, grab his ass cheek as I put it inside I've always felt that there was something divine the thought of two bodies becoming one without history; greed and malice all but left behind he purifies me from years I've spent in awful solitary ...Read more

Amateur Pornographic

Amateur Pornographic

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