"Everything is great." That's what ma said with her eyes,
Faintly and glowing, and going sadly blind.
Descend. "Everything is great and will be great,
Delicate and radiant, and full of life as you are, mine Child."
Mama, look at what I'm becoming, not the one imagined. I am real. I am real! I am here, am I not?
…Where people saw kindness in her, they saw the same much of nothing in me.
I saw nothing back at the world, too– mind you– nothing but black, and brown,
And gray, and teal, and cyan, Ember over ember. Clout after clout.
Brilliant child, intellectual child, promising child ...Read more
There's pride in sharing
And then there's bowing down
To lust upon Hollywoodizing mythologies
my kababayan are eager to laud about
It's easier to hate your own, hate your own, hate your own
Because you wait for the paint to turn to white
So you can appreciate them?
With what? A bigger pocket?
A better dress?
What to you makes a better dress?
One that submits to universal attention?
But they weren't designed after Western values
They were made for your immediates' eyes
You twist your tongue to sound like you come
from another village
and pity those who still talk like the previou ...Read more
Part I: Chaos And Religion
If you had a nickel for every time you crossed the road rooting
for speeding cars to hit you in the middle
in the middle where you close your eyes, waiting for that glorious fin
Knowing that you will not get cheered on in the afterlife
and you're okay with it
But in the cold in-betweens and moments of internal chaos
that have you wondering
should you give in to theism, humanity's greatest vanity
bow down to deities, pray to non-existing endless varieties
that your mother and her sisters would not shut up about
that the world wouldn't stop shoving down our ...Read more
I am not alright with dying.
I am not alright with living, either.
I am stuck in the pathos in between,
A purgatory of my own making.
One thread, one sledgehammer of my own sins.
Some times I hate everyone. Some times I hate myself. I’m sick. I’m dizzy.
Growing peaches in the dark.
Getting stoic,
Going greedy.
Nectarine before the fall,
Remedric after thaw.
The world rushes straight, heteronormative too much,
Disputes over land,
Made-up histo[r]ic value,
Burying children in the sand.
Surely the gods didn’t put us here to argue but, boy, do you enjoy it.
Forward.
Forward. ...Read more
You do not compare to him
All your work and you still do not compare to him
You aren't even a pale imitation
Just a passing soul that will never be good enough
Tall enough
Succeeding enough
Resilient enough
Happy enough
Powerful enough
enough
Enough!
You set his picture as your screensaver
A telltale of a man you will never become
That green sun pierces through your blinds
Consume you with gusto
like burns on your face
You will never be that sight for sore eyes
That calms the city and lull giants to sleep
They want not your flesh and will toss you aside
for fresher peach, a ...Read more
Poetry
Language exists
not to be policed,
but to have fun with as one lives
– Life In the Infinite Foreword
A collection of all the prose and poems I've decided to announce ahead of schedule and/or publish. Works ongoing. Click here for the poetry tag search.
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SNAG A COPY
...Read more
Anarchy of the mind.
I wrote some welcome-to-my-blog remarks, which you can read here.
